A Speck in Your Eye, A Beam in Mine

The following post is based on 4 years of observing the behaviours of the very colourful area of the Melbourne CBD (the one in Australia to all Floridans). The gist=Everyone of every different colour and background has a good reason to beat the shit out of each other. But what if you knew they have differences that is easier to understand? Would you change the way you think about this?

I am an international student at RMIT University and I study at the city campus. Melbourne CBD is just full of students from almost everywhere (cept North Korea best I can tell), most of whom their parents have mortgaged their youth so they can study here. A lot of things happen in a day, that I speculate can start a race riot, some possibly involve strife between an international group and another.

Let's start with me. I personally do not like behaviours of international students from China and India the most (having said that I have friends from both countries; the behaviours I am speaking against are so bad that I am pretty sure Indians and Chinese who read about these will just shake their heads and tell themselves "oh my god I hate them too").

China

You are super cocky. You walk like your father and mother own the street you walk on and you speak trash about other people in your own language, in front of them.You cut in line whenever it suits you. Your attitude is super shitty. You disobey library rules most often and just talk like nobody cares. I am a Malaysian Chinese and I have to say that a lot of you have a lot to learn from others.

You are pretty two-faced creatures in that you worship Caucasians and impose double standards in dealing with Caucasians and other races. Chinese girls, it's pretty plain that you judge every guy that passes you by by their race. Yes race. It used to be the pretty ones who glare at the geeky non-caucasian students but now even the ugly ones are joining in. But some of you try to balance it out with your impudence towards everyone.

India

On par with China students, even though mostly you don't get along with them. Jaywalking is so frequently associated with you guys. You all walk when the pedestrian traffic light is red AND WHEN CARS HAVE THE RIGHT OF WAY!!!!!!!. What's wrong with you people? This is not your Mumbai where you can walk like you want to be knocked by stupid Indian drivers(of course there are courteous ones too). You think you look cool when you walk down the streets but you have spite in your eyes. Even though everyone else gave you a really hard time here a few years ago, now you are the ones who honestly bring it upon YOURSELVES!!!!! And yes you talk in libraries too, without regard for the rules! why bother speaking english if you don't even know western manners!!!!!!!

You China and India students, the unis here are fucked in the brain to let you come here, because honestly, you make the Malaysian, Indonesian, Thai, Vietnamese and the Singaporean international students look bad with your impudence!

Malaysians and Singaporeans

Cliquish as usual. Not keeping up with all their activities is like waving a flag that you want to be isolated by the others. If you don't fit in from the start, you never get a chance. Once again, it's looks, but not just any kind of look. There can only be room for one or two of each kind ie jocks, nerds, beauty queens, plain looking girls, and all must be super extroverted all the time. Yah, people can see through the veneer you all put on and it's embarrassing.

British

Stiff, stiff, stiff. You expect the whole world to know your manners, and you have so much pride. All you do is stare at people who aren't doing what British manners require and you don't even attempt to say what is on your mind, not even consider that other people don't really know what they are doing. Shame on you, thinking you know better and quietly tut tutting the people who could change if you gave them a chance.

Australians

For once and for all let's make this clear. Even though this is not a racist country, there are more racists than would be portrayed. There is a particular kind of Asian you would not discriminate against, a particular kind of Indian, a particular kind of Brit, one of each kind. You fix your eyes on these kinds of "images" and declare all deviations are the same as 2nd class citizens. Usually it's attractiveness that is the key criteria eh? But amongst "Aussies" it's not supposed to matter does it (even though it does. Won't go into that because you already know about that)Don't need to speak the answer, your eyes already said it for you. 99.9999% of your kind of racism is thought, not spoken and yes it shows when you think about racist remarks, even if you don't say it. People who aren't white actually have ears and most are educated in English and look like students so they can actually hear you when you make remarks about them. It's such a shame you aren't more outspokenly racist, because you already appear to have got the non-verbal cues right.

Ok, time for a break from all this crap. From here on, these are just some observations about the above people

Australians

Most think they are easy going(I think it's a more accurate to say they love the 'fair go'). The fair go is their goddess whom they pray to, worship and offer sacrifices to. Anyone who even appears to make light of the fair go is a wretched cur(the point is that you get how seriously they take it, regardless of whether they would give you fair go or not).

Their idea of building relationships is by giving the person a fair-go. This can take so many forms. They would be open to get to know you, let you have your say etc. Unlike a lot of other nations, people who grow up in Australia cannot really comprehend genuineness. They have a tendency to feel bad for making people go through things they consider unfair(even though it is necessary to get a job done or just because someone promised them to). So for the other person to say they for example, "I love working here even if it's long" is often construed as "You stupid motherfucker, make me work so long for what! Chee bye kia go to hell lah!". Even though they appear laid-back, their expectation that you say the right thing in the right way(not the same as in Britain, where it has to be a courteous response) in a cheeky way can be a real chore if you aren't born with a witty personality. The right response for our example is to tell what you look forward to doing after work is over.

Australia has also had a history that was pretty much isolated from Asia and experienced as much contact with Europe as their ships allowed them(some Australians think they were also isolated from NZ people). This makes the fair-go like the mono-God and it is their identity, unlike let's say, the Malayan Peninsula(and their history). The only god that has the closest resemblance to the Fair-Go is the god of the Brits which is Proprietary-ness(don't know the proper wording, if you know please share thanks). That means they are not as open to getting to know another kind of god like, Guan-Xi or Happy-go-lucky-smiling-all-the-time.

Their isolation means that they more often think they are right and are slower to consider a second opinion, even though it's supposed to be part of the fair go(she is not a perfect goddess). Also, given the guilt they feel obligated to carry on their shoulders makes them bitter company if there is something you think is a shortcoming of Australians that is worth debating about (to them, saying that the goddess Fair Go is not doing a good job in her own kingdom is offending to them, even though it's sometimes true). They also don't like speaking about your weaknesses even when there is a time for it; they'd rather tell their friends about it than you. If they feel offended by a personality difference of yours, or if they are jealous, do not ever hope to hear such a confession from them, unless you have hooked them up to a vodka enema. So don't hold your breath if you are not related to them by marriage or if you are not their boyfriend/girlfriend.

What is the way around this then? As a suggestion, stop any attempt to show they are wrong. That will make them not even change their minds. Just suspend your rationality and just say that the imperfection is tied to yourself. Even if they say they are rational people, they are in actual fact worshippers of Fair Go, so you'd be pretty stupid to keep insisting that you are right especially without a watertight case of proof (which is a chore) . Better to find a way to make you have the same kind of weakness they have, then they'll listen.

When it comes to trying new things, they are more like Asians, and in some ways worse. Asians never open themselves to the public unless they seem to fit a mold that is iconic or desirable (so hot Asian babes and jocks are positively perceived as volunteers but trends show that the average asian is more accepted too). If there is a crowd, Aussies will first be looking for the person they think is stupid enough to step out. Then they'll watch that person who volunteers to see if they make a mistake (fair-go once again is an imperfect goddess), anything that would make them an embarrassment because to volunteer oneself is a non-verbal cue that the volunteer thinks he is better than the crowd. They too would try to find a way to make the volunteer an embarrassment if they see an opportunity to do so. If the volunteer succeeds, then Fair Go will snatch away this train of thought from their conscious memory, replacing instead with a train of thought that they can do better than the volunteer which guides their subsequent actions. Aussies call this objective thinking.

At the end of the day, think of what is fair and do it. Remember, they like to hear what a person has on his mind, just think of a fair way to say it.

British

Their god as mentioned is Proprietary, meaning everything must be proper, every aspect of life. There is a place for each person in the world and everyone has a station. There is always a proper way to do things and proper ways not to do them. There is a proper way to walk and talk, and proper places and times to do them. Some are genuine about this in that properness is all they care about and wouldn't be racist on grounds of proprietary. Some are assholes.

The way with them is a bit simpler and it's not just talking about Arsenal. They love correcting people when they are sure they are right and when they think it is proper to do so. When they do, thank them for the correction don't just brush it aside. If you are walking in a tight space and the person from the other side is british, just a step to the side gets you their attention. They won't necessarily thank you, because it may not be proper to them(rubbish, I say, fucking rubbish) but there are those who are smart enough to do so.

The rule of thumb- it's all about the proper way. Rest assured for every properly behaved brit there are probably 7 others who aren't and so you will stand out to those who matter.

Malaysian-Singaporeans

This is all about being yourself yet caring for those within the clique. As opposed to Western "being yourself-ness", this being yourself-ness has less to with expressing political opinions(even more so for Malaysians) and more to do with just your personal traits. Remember to establish an identity as a first priority; malaysians and singaporeans have to know why you fit into their group, even if it's not something that can be put into words. Are you rich? Are you handsome? Are you an overachiever? A laid-back guy?

Ok, it's not that superficial. Most cliques are open to having new friends (the ones who aren't never tell you but you'll know when you don't feel welcome), and would give you opportunities to join them in their activities. Remember, they care more about you being a part of what they do before they get to know you as a person. But these opportunities are mostly in the first few days, after that, they expect you to have made up your mind; either you are part of the group or you are just one of the group member's one-on-one friends. After that, it becomes hard to have you around. Don't feel that you have to keep appearances here. The more you learn how to balance letting yourself go without causing offence, the better.

China

Stay away from those who are proud; they need time to learn that they cannot rely on their parents' money to pay for their luxuries forever. But there are those who are open minded.

Even then, it pays to pay attention to what they do for you. A lot of relationship building happens in the finer details, as in how they help you and they will expect you to help them too. Unlike the Western way of settling the score, there is more of a kinship that forms from it. They expect you to identify their needs and help them too. If they have helped you, they would assume that you will help them too, without putting too much of an argument.

India

They have a different sense of time. That's why some of them jaywalk. Very spontaneous people and when together are not inhibited from expressing themselves regardless of how unacceptable it may be to others. They were mostly despised by the locals and the international students somewhere between 2005 and 2006. So if you step into a curry joint and the serving girl says go and fuck your mother with her eyes, or you get spit in your curry that's why. Anyway, rememeber to relax when with them and learning an indian word or two does a lot to open doors.